Recently, I chatted with the editor of the Journal of the American Viola Society, Christina Ebersohl, and during our conversation, we discussed dealing with discouragement, not just as editors but as ordinary humans. November is a hard month for many people. NaNoWriMo is in full swing, daylight saving time ends, and the holidays are right around the corner. And all that falls on top of our day jobs and responsibilities. It’s so easy to feel overwhelmed, disheartened, or glum. As Christina and I talked, we traded ideas about how to combat discouragement.

Win Jars

A win jar is a container holding slips of paper that list your accomplishments or any compliments you’ve received. The idea has been around for a while, but it’s a great way to tackle impostor syndrome or general discouragement. You can customize your win jar to suit your personality. Use a pretty box, a fun mug, or a recycled fishbowl. Handwrite your accomplishments on slips of fancy stationery, or just cut and paste your compliments into a Word file and print them out on colorful paper. My win jar is a blue glass bottle with a ribbon tied around the neck. When one of my clients sends me a thank-you card or writes a positive review, I print a copy to add to my jar. How your win jar looks isn’t the important bit—the content is.

Be sure to include both small and big wins on your paper slips. Did you meet your weekly word count for NaNoWriMo? Write it down and put it in the jar. Did you perfect an amazing recipe for dinner? Add it to your jar. Did one of your clients give you a fantastic review? Did your boss love how you handled that tricky situation at work? Have you met your exercise goals for this week? These situations all call for win jar entries.

Next time you’re feeling low, pull out one (or a handful!) of your slips and enjoy the boost of self-confidence from remembering your past wins. For even more encouragement, share your wins on social media with hashtag #WinJar.

Gratitude List

Sometimes a mindset shift can help when we’re in a funk. Instead of focusing on all the things that have me down, I’ll write a gratitude list. Like my win jar, my gratitude list includes both small and big items. I’m grateful that my dad’s surgery was successful. I’m also grateful for the beautiful maple tree outside my window. I love the way the leaves change color this time of year, and that makes me happy. Maybe you’re grateful for a new client or a solution to a technical issue. If your kids told you they loved you before they got on the bus this morning, that could go on your list. Even something as simple as appreciating the warmth of the sun on your skin counts for this exercise.

By focusing on gratitude, we’re increasing the amount of dopamine and serotonin in our brains. That boosts our mood and increases happiness. Practicing gratitude also reduces levels of stress hormones and makes us more resilient when we have negative experiences. A few moments focused on gratitude—two or three entries on my list—can be enough to help improve my mindset.

Support Network

Occasionally, words on a page or slips of paper from your win jar aren’t enough to combat discouragement. I’ve been there. We need an actual human to talk to, and that’s ok. Sometimes we just need someone to listen. Maybe we need advice, or we want actual help with a situation. This is where your support network comes in. Do you remember the song “Lean on Me” by Bill Withers? We all need somebody to lean on. Have a good network in place so you’re ready when the hard times come.

If you’re a writer, consider joining a writers’ group. Social media offers an easy way to join groups for professionals, whether you’re an editor or a baker. Exchange contact information with your neighbors or book club members. When you need someone to lean on, be it personally or professionally, you’ll have someone to talk to. And when the members of your network need a hand, you’ll be able to help them as well.

Takeaways

When we’re feeling down, we can use three techniques to combat discouragement. First, we can use our past successes and accomplishments to increase our self-confidence by reviewing items from our win jars. Second, we can take stock of the things we’re currently grateful for by writing a gratitude list to improve our mindset. Third, we can draw on the support of our colleagues, friends, neighbors, or family members when we need help. If you need help with a writing project, let me know! I’d love to learn about your project and partner with you to make your writing bulletproof!